Queen of the Happenstance Realm

Happenstance, it is all just happenstance isn't it? This blog is used to share my thoughts about whatever silly or serious somethin' or other that's on mind- I use to update it everyday until... until... Feel free to leave comments, I love sharing ideas and IF you comment, I might start posting again. Represented are some aspects of who I am. All this together is a small piece of my life.

Wednesday, November 30

Company Christmas Parties

Our Christmas budget breakdown for say 200 expected employees and their spouses probably cost the company around $15000 (though I could be way off). Paying for the space, food and drink for 400 folks I’m guessing alone costs about $12000 or so. Then they do prizes on top of that, maybe $2000 worth. I suppose when all is said and done my estimate for a medium size party at a nice place with spouses invited is approximately $37.50 a person or $75 an employee.

This is worth it to me. Many times in companies you don’t have an opportunity to get out and talk to people outside those you see everyday so parties help create a sense of unity. You also never get to see people’s spouses and that’s a shame. I also think the employees feel valued when the company goes to such measures and that results in company loyalty and other positive benefits. Besides that, memories are made that would be difficult to match. The $75 is equivalent to what that employee might spend for a similar night out with his spouse if they were to “do it up” on the same scale. Besides that, I’m guessing the company can write off at least some of the expenses.

Now having said that, I feel sorry for those that behave badly at these events. Losing your job or the respect of your co-workers would not be worth one night of fun (though my idea of fun wouldn’t be embarrassing).


What are your thoughts on them? How much should the budget be?

Tuesday, November 29

PTSD

The war is going on and days go by when I don’t think about it. It isn’t because I don’t care; it is because if I think about it too much I will get terribly depressed. I hear about it everyday but the words sometimes just go through me.

I mean, there are people dying in a War that I think was waged for the wrong reasons. These people are not exacting revenge for the 9-11 attacks; they are fighting for their lives for different reasons than what was sold to the American people. That is difficult to deal with and I can’t imagine being over there while everyone else is over here- all alone and wondering about it all.

There are those soldiers that believe in the cause and have no regrets. I respect them tremendously even if I don’t relate to that thought-process. I will always question war because even if it is the only answer- it seems like it creates more problems than solutions.

I have to think there are a lot more soldiers that signed up because they felt they had no where else to go, because a recruiter told them what they wanted to hear (whether it was true or not), or maybe they were self-destructive and thought this might give their lives meaning. Whatever they signed up for, I think most trusted they would only face combat if the cause was great and the danger imminent. I think they believed our leaders would have a plan for victory and wage war responsibly. I’m sure the thought there would be a definition of success leading ultimately to an exit strategy. They must feel so misled- those who feel the way I imagine so many must.

What is a soldier to do? I just read an article that sent chills through my spine. One man said he was trained to kill period and that “skill” doesn’t translate into a civilian world. One man said no one would understand him because so few could relate to what he had to deal with- the killing of children, the onslaught of innocent people- blood and destruction everywhere. This man killed himself in his parent’s home. Now they are left to sort-out their emotions. Another guy is broke and trying to support his family of 4 on a $13 an hour security job- much less glamorous than the job the recruiter promised he’d easily land when he came out of the military.

Do the people in Iraq even want us there? I hear civil war is imminent if we leave, isn’t it always imminent? It seems to me from what I’ve heard that brutal dictators thrive in war minded areas because the person most feared wins. No winners there to me.

So many broken hearts- so many families destroyed. Innocence lost and the pain just sets in- the aftermath will be felt for a LONG TIME. VA Hospitals are understaffed and underfunded and so many soldiers return without a will to live, much less work or engage in normal day-to-day routines like the rest of us. Sometimes I struggle with the day-to-day demands and I have far less to deal with. How long does it go on?

1/3 of the nation's homeless men are veterans. The divorce rate for soldiers returning from the war is really high and I can only imagine how many more families will be torn apart in this war. All these people will be relying on the government to see them through, us tax-payers will foot the bill (not just for the war but for the fall-out that no one talks about). Those programs are dirty words in the mouths of a lot of political officials today- the same ones pushing to continue the war.

I support our soldiers, I feel for the pain they suffer. I love my country but I don’t like our leadership. Wonder how much longer we’ll stay the course- I heard a leader say today that we shouldn’t have a plan for leaving but have a plan for victory- seems to me like the loss outweighs the gains. The blood is on our of our hands.

How does the rest of the world see us? I fear there will be more (not less) danger in the world as the hatred of the US grows.

Did you say you were thankful for the sacrifices our soldiers were making this Thanksgiving- I didn’t. I didn’t even think about the war. Think of all those who couldn’t escape it. It makes me sad. Feeling sad about it makes me not want to think about it, that makes me more sad.

Accents

Accents are great- they set a tone and add interest to what is being said. Accents often put you at ease- I love listening to the English accent most. Most English people sound thoughtful and kind. I also like the way they make statements with questions. The English fella on Designing for the Sexes is a great example of how much of an impact an accent can make. He’s an older guy who is pretty small but his accent is so sweet that he gets my attention when he might not otherwise.

Other accents to note- Hugh Grant. I don’t find him all that attractive but I like his appearanc in combination with his accent. My boss’ wife- her French accent is so beautiful (French accents sound better on women to me).

Still the accents are usually best in small doses- after awhile they can lose their charm (anyone working at my company understands). So I suppose one could say that sometimes they backfire- for example, I don’t like the accent of Madonna’s (not at all).

What accents do you find noteworthy?

Sunday, November 27

Sharing Everything?

Do you let it go in front of your spouse/loved one/friends. By let it go, I mean do you feel comfortable enough to pass gas, cut the cheese, stink it up? I don’t. Why? Because yes we’re all human, we all do it, and it is still gross regardless of whom it is coming from. Not to say I will make myself sick or go to great lengths to avoid it- but do I extend the common courtesy of going to another room or a different area- yes.

Growing up I knew of certain folks who could be really fowl- I mean to the extent that their room constantly smelled rotten. I thought how sad I would feel for their spouse one day, I vowed to try and refrain from grossing out the person I’m suppose to be romantic with to whatever extent I could.

I married someone that shares the sentiment. Of course around the guys, well certain guys, he’ll loosen up but I’ve only heard of this (not literally but you know what I mean).

Anyway, some of our friends remembered us talking about this and asked if they remembered it clearly- they couldn’t believe after 8 years of marriage, 14 years of being together- we’d still have this hang-up. We said yeah but we don’t see it as a hang-up. They couldn’t believe it.

Having said that, I’ve known people who couldn’t do anything other than pee in their own home. They would go to the gas station to take care of business. That shocked me. Not only because of the obvious reasons but because gas stations are gross. Like my friend once said- people think things strange up to the point that they themselves do it. It’s like brushing your teeth- 2 times a day is bare minimum for me, anything less would seem gross. But there are those that can’t go all day without brushing- three times is necessary. We all have different views.

What’s your view? Do you share EVERYTHING with your spouse/loved ones/friends.

PS- I work with someone (of whom I’ll NEVER NAME that is always letting them go. It tends to be very quiet in my work area and this person has no problem with it being heard- that or doesn’t know it can be. I don’t have to smell them thank goodness because when I hear them I clear out- but still I’m always shocked. Can’t say it doesn’t make me laugh a little though, why is that?


PSS- When my boys do it (my lil’ ones) it isn’t a problem for me at all. My youngest even tries to do it on command (especially if he’s sitting on my lap). I’m not encouraging it but whatever. I tell him that isn’t nice and move on. He laughs and laughs.

Saturday, November 26

A House

A place for Self-Expression or First Impressions?

Friday, November 25

The Day After (no let down)

I've posted about the day-after Holiday (or big event) let down in the past but I have to say that today that has NOT been a problem. Yesterday was great, we ate wonderful food and everyone was in good spirits, I even helped out with the cooking quite a bit and the boys behaved themselves without me hovering over them (of course my awesome neice and nephew were a big part of that being possible).

My favorite part was the Connect Four games at SOS' house though- I love playing (winning) games. My Aunt and Uncle were down too and spending time with my Dad and them was also really nice. Anyway, spending time with people I love really refueled me and now I'm feelin' refreshed. We missed NLPs family but watched Vegas Vacation in their honor (falling asleep well before it was over).

I'm especially thrilled today because I don't have ANY Christmas decorating to do. We finished it in one day LAST WEEKEND. Captain handled the decorating on the outside and I managed the inside. Usually the day after Thankgiving I'm tired and dreading the work and patience required for Christmas decorating but now I'm just looking around enjoying it all. We'll stick to this plan from now on.

I did plan on shopping today but decided better of it. I'm feelin' good but maybe just a little too tired to deal with the crowds and lines. Lines really bug me. I don't want to overbuy this year either (like I did last year) and haven't really decided what to buy for whom so I'll just think about it some more.

Meanwhile there's still plenty to do and we'll take some time out to relax too. It is lookin' like the idea for the Drive-in tonight is still on, I'm really looking forward to it. I guess it will be just me and my boys (all 3 of them) which is cool- I love group activities but family ones are just as good. Speaking of the family, check out our family blog for some new pictures.

Wednesday, November 23

Kindness

Somewhere along the line I grew into a person who can be very critical. I think it first started when I was attempting to learn from others in regards to relationships, money management, and things of that nature. Really it was innocent enough. Then when I thought I had figured out certain truths, I began to find myself talking about the downfalls of those who hadn't (at least from my perspective). This wasn't on purpose and generally would fall into typical normal conversations just like the ones you hear everyday but that doesn't make them right.

I don't mean to imply that I think critically about people all the time or all people; there are certain people I say nothing negative about and support 100%. I finally realized the reason I am less critical of some people over others is because it is difficult to be mean spirited to kind people. I have so many kind people in my life that I know being a kind person is totally possible, but you have to want to be. So here I am vowing right here/right now to be more kind.

Other truths I've come to know to aid me in my kindness quest…
1. It is okay to say what's on your mind if your intent is good, however you should NOT depend on others to validate what your saying. The trick- if what is on your mind isn't logical or is mean spirited, let it go before it comes out.

2. Surround yourself with people who get you.
Not everyone likes everyone, not everyone relates to everyone- this is just a fact, what they told you in school about us all being the same deep down ISN'T TRUE. I like to be liked but I don't live to be liked by unlikable people.

3. Protect yourself.
I tend to see the good in people, but few people are always good. If the ugly side of you comes out around certain people, make a conscience effort to change yourself and the dynamics of the friendship- ugliness has a way of growing and turning into something that gets out of control.

4. Take responsibility for your actions and behavior only.
I can control what I do, I need to own up to the things I do that are not ideal or kind. I cannot control if others don't subscribe to the same philosophies. Enjoy the good, steer clear of the bad and hope that in the end the kindness shows through.

5. People don't have to communicate.
If others take issue with you and don't discuss their feelings, that's not something you can do much about. If people want to jump to wrong conclusions or enjoy perpetuating conflict, just accept nothing more can be done and try not give them ammunition (easier said than done).

6. Consider the source.
Given enough time, conflict occurs; conflict resolution is necessary at times. If conflict is unavoidable, consider the source.

It is never too late to change and you have to learn to forgive (even if you're not asked to). Holding on to resentment makes you mean and ugly.

I'm going to put out more good stuff so in the words of my friend Earl- my life isn't crap. Maybe that's why I like My Name is Earl, it gives me hope that we all are capable of becoming better people. Do you have a list? I think I will start trying to make up for the wrongs I've done- or in the least try not to repeat them.

1st thing on the list- stop being so critical (of myself and others).
2nd thing on my list- if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.

Tuesday, November 22

Coffee Pots

Why with all the advancements in technology do coffee pots still leak when you pour from them?

Monday, November 21

Christmas Letter

The Christmas letter topic can tend to be a little controversial. You may laugh but it is true. Just think about the history…

There was a time when one's Christmas letter had to be hand written. It would be addressed to the individual and pertinent to how you related to that person- personal if you knew them well, vague and upbeat is you didn't- etc. These were great to receive; being added to one's Christmas list was somewhat of a compliment- you were someone special to be included because of the effort and energy that goes into it.

Then the typewriter came along. It sped things up. Letters could be longer now, so perhaps they were more interesting and personal but a little less impressive due to the fact that it was perceived as making Christmas letters more readily available to the masses.

Then the personal PC came along- WOW, people had fun with this. I remember my first mailing was in mass. I created form letters to individuals and families with fields and everything. I was learning all about this in my computer classes in school so I thought I'd give it a try in real life- the letter was lacking, errors were made, and I'm sure I came off looking a little silly but that was me at age twelve.

Years have come and gone, I've sent letters and I've sent cards- I like to do pictures and they are often in different formats. I believe my form letter has evolved; now I add humor and clipart so hopefully it is interesting (but I suppose it is up to the reader). Now I'm deciding what to do this year- any suggestions? I find people have strong opinions- my advice is not to get too personal and too detailed. My pet-peeve is when people try to lend impressions that are not accurate or get too braggy. What about you?

Friday, November 18

Arrogance

So we’re going to keep the tax cuts that mainly benefit the rich right? We’re going to cut social programs at the same time? Like my Dad always said- the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. I haven’t actually looked into all the details (there are many many to consider) but I know I’ve heard it more than once from more than one source- the gap widens in economic classes when Republicans are in power. Funny thing is I’d like to be a Republican. I’m a Christian and I like the idea of my values being reflected in law but what about taking care of the needy? Isn’t that an important Christian value? What about caring for our environment- being good stewards of what God has blessed us with? I don’t get it, how much money is enough?

How can a country spending so much money continue to give unnecessary tax cuts to those with the most? We’re spending more on natural disasters and the war but the average citizen isn’t being called to sacrifice anything tax wise (except on the state level in a lot of cases because of the Federal mandates that are not being called into question by the average voter). The sacrifices will be asked of the poor only? I mean, if our country doesn’t meet the needs of those people who need it most they will lose hope. Guess what happens to hopeless people- THEY BECOME BIGGER BURDENS ON SOCIETY. It is a vicious circle and a costly gamble- our course by the time the true effects are felt these elected officials will be collecting all the benefits afforded to them because they “were” in office, they’ll enjoy living off the government even though they are in great positions to earn plenty enough to care for themselves (look into the benefits of elected officials- it will BLOW YOUR MIND).

As you can see, I don’t like handout programs- if you’re able bodied and/or can contribute/be a productive member of society- you should (rich or poor). In the case of poor people, I’ll even go a step farther and say if you’re living off the government you shouldn’t be continuing to have children (get yourself in a position to support your children before increasing the size of your family). If you spend more than you can afford and you make a decent living, bail yourself out- don’t look to get a free ride back to financial freedom. I suppose I go with the idea that we all should be held accountable for our decisions- INCLUDING OUR GOVERNMENT. We try to limit our spending to maintaining what needs to be maintained and funding the luxury items after the fact. The government seems to be looking at things backwards.

I mean, I think about the financial strains we’re under (my family specifically) living in an average house, driving cars that combined we’re under $30k when we bought them, raising two kids… I can’t help but wonder how people can care for their families with less money that we have and when you compare our earnings to those of 2 income families making around minimum wage it blows my mind. I mean, we make 3 times as much- probably 4 times when you factor in our benefits and we can’t afford a lot of our “wants”. Now I know the Republicans aren’t asking these folks to pay much in taxes but the money has to come from somewhere to pay for the basic needs of people- not just the poor but our society as a whole. We need money to fund the court systems, education, streets & highways, etc. Not all government spending goes to welfare for the poor like people like to think and A LOT of it goes to programs for the rich- the government subsidized programs that keep the professionals busy working on high dollar projects not needed- I call it welfare for the rich and it goes on ALL THE TIME.

One person I heard on the radio said it best- these new budget proposals give a new meaning to Women and Children first- as in women raising children on their own and suffering financially for it and the children who most often bears the brunt of program cuts. When are we as a nation going to look out for the best interest of the needs of the nation on a whole? I am so sad to see the direction our great country is going- the only light I can see is if many those enlightened folks that voted Republican can see that these elected officials do not stand for what they say they do- they do not care about the average worker and we’ll continue to see our standards of living decrease, our power as a country go down because of the deficit, and our unity in times of need continue to decline. I would love to see a more responsible compassionate government. What they are doing now in the times we’re facing is DISGRACEFUL!!!

Thursday, November 17

Really

Really. It is a word I use A LOT (probably too much). I most often say it when I’m surprised or disappointed.

Before I get started, let me say I use to be shy. Yeah, I was afraid of speaking up because I feared being rejected. I am much less shy now (though I still struggle with it from time to time). Now my struggles with shyness are a direct result of my efforts to avoid disappointment (or put myself in a situation where I’ll behave badly). When I say disappointment, I mean disappointment in others. I tend to live in a fantasy world where everyone is kind and thoughtful, that bad things happen usually because of unfortunate circumstances or as a result of a misunderstanding. Above all I tend to expect parents will behave like role models because well… THEY ARE ROLE MODELS.

So anyway, I am often reminded of just how wrong I am when people don’t respond the way I’d like them to. Say in the parking lot of the elementary school- aren’t we supposed to show our kids the blessings in being generous? What happened to the 1 person merge rule? No I don’t expect the merging traffic to sit all day while some “nice” person lets everyone else go but that 1 person rule is ideal. Did not everyone get the memo?

I have many REALLY moments on any given day- like when someone thinks they’re putting me in my “place” when I totally agree with them? Why do people seek out controversy and conflict? I don’t get it.

I often go off of intent- if there’s ANY WAY I can justify bad behavior I’ve had to receive or hear of, I generally do because we all have our moments. But sometimes I just have to sit back and absorb it with no other defense besides REALLY??? But really really is a good defense. I observe, I identify with my feelings on it and then I try to move on (really).

Overlap

Our oldest son just had his end-of-the-season soccer party at CiCis last night and the whole thing gave me the warm and fuzzies. My brother coached them this year and I was extremely proud to have a family member invest themselves in such a worthwhile effort (the Captain helped out too so that was also very cool).

To show our appreciation, we went together and got him a Coach’s Thank You card and the Kicking and Screaming DVD (which I hope he’ll really enjoy) and my sister-in-law bought all the players little goodie bags full of soccer stuff.

It was especially great for us because we had 4 kids on the team that already knew each other- I like the way Church spills into sports, sports spills into work, work spills into family and family spills into Church. My life has a lot of overlapping which is super cool because I’m always surrounded by people I care about (and who care about me).

Time well spent! Goodness all around.

Wednesday, November 16

Drive-In

www.galaxydriveintheatre.com

I love the Drive-in movie concept! Going with a group is awesome and the one we visit has good food that is inexpensive. I'm on their newsletter distribution and just received one today. Can't imagine we'll make it any time soon (the schedule is jam packed) but I would love to.

In case you're interested and you live locally- in the Dallas/Ft Worth area...
NEW FALL / WINTER START TIMES are as follows... the box office and snack bar opens at 5:30pm 1st feature starts Sunday thru Thursday at 7:00PM and the 1st feature starts at 7:30PM on Friday & Saturday.

Right now would be a great time to take kids- they're playing Chicken Little - (G) & Zathura - (PG). Not sure what Zathura is but we generally don't stick around for the second show so it isn't that important to me. Anyway, it is just a suggestion and in my opinion worth the drive if you have the time! But bundle up- it is getting cold (all the more fun to me).

Tuesday, November 15

Decay of Fluoride

Really? People are fighting about fluoride?

Its good stuff right, I mean my dentist prescribed it to me at one time and my teeth were greatly improved. I’ve been complemented on my teeth ever since (and we never went to the Dentist). I chalk it up to eating right, brushing regularly and drinking tap water- our city’s water has FLOURIDE in it. I mean in low doses it helps out tooth decay and so we're lucky to have it in our drinking water right? RIGHT!!!

It is easy to believe people who want to say otherwise but after hearing about this and researching with an open mind I’ve made up my mind. This is the article I found that best lines up with my views. It not only addresses the issue at hand but addresses propaganda in general and it is good info to know so that you can guard yourself against people who don’t have your best interest at heart.

I know, this subject sounds like a joke. I thought it was when I heard them talking about it on NPR but now I get it. People feel passionately about this subject and they should- the facts speak for themselves. Who know fluoride could be so riveting?

http://www.quackwatch.org/03HealthPromotion/fluoride.html

Fluoridation:
Don't Let the Poisonmongers Scare You!

Bob Sprague
Mary Bernhardt
Stephen Barrett, M.D.

Fluoride is a mineral that occurs naturally in most water supplies. Fluoridation is the adjustment of the natural fluoride concentration to about one part of fluoride to one million parts of water. Although fluoridation is safe and effective in preventing tooth decay, the scare tactics of misguided poisonmongers have deprived many communities of its benefits.

The history of fluoridation in the United States underlines its unique standing as a public health measure copied from a natural phenomenon. In the early 1900s, Dr. Frederick S. McKay began an almost 30-year search for the cause of the staining of teeth that was prevalent in Colorado, where he practiced dentistry. In his investigation, McKay found the condition common in other states, including Texas, where it was known as "Texas teeth." In 1928, he concluded that such teeth, although stained, showed "a singular absence of decay," and that both the staining and the decay resistance were caused by something in the water. In 1931, the "something" was identified as fluoride.

The Public Health Service then took over to determine precisely what amount of fluoride in the water would prevent decay without causing staining. Years of "shoeleather epidemiology" by Dr. H. Trendley Dean traced the dental status of 7,000 children who drank naturally fluoridated water in 21 cities in four states. In 1943, he reported that the ideal amount of fluoride was one part per million parts of water. This concentration was demonstrated to result in healthy, attractive teeth that had one-third as many cavities as might otherwise be expected -- and no staining.

The next step was to determine whether water engineering could copy nature's amazing dental health benefit. At several test sites, the fluoride concentration of the public water supply was adjusted to one part per million.

One such test was conducted in the neighboring cities of Newburgh and Kingston, New York. First, the children in both cities were examined by dentists and physicians; then fluoride was added to Newburgh's water supply. After ten years, the children of Newburgh had 58% fewer decayed teeth than those of nonfluoridated Kingston. The greatest benefits were obtained by children who had drunk the fluoridated water since birth. Other studies showed that teeth made stronger by fluoride during childhood would remain permanently resistant to decay. As the evidence supporting fluoridation accrued, thousands of communities acted to obtain its benefits.
Too much fluoride can cause dental fluorosis, which, in its mildest form, causes small, white, virtually invisible opaque areas on teeth. In severe form, fluorosis results in brownish mottling. However, dental fluorosis is not caused by artificial fluoridation, because the levels are kept low enough to avoid this effect.

Recent data have shown that fluoridation has been reducing the incidence of cavities 20% to 40% in children and 15% to 35% in adults. The reduction is less than it used to be, probably due to improved dental hygiene and widespread use of fluoride toothpaste. Currently, more than 140 million Americans live in fluoridated communities. But 80 million others receive public water supplies that are not fluoridated -- thanks largely to the efforts of poisonmongers.
How Poisonmongers Work

The antifluoridationists' ("antis") basic technique is the big lie. Made infamous by Hitler, it is simple to use, yet surprisingly effective. It consists of claiming that fluoridation causes cancer, heart and kidney disease, and other serious ailments that people fear. The fact that there is no supporting evidence for such claims does not matter. The trick is to keep repeating them -- because if something is said often enough, people tend to think there must be some truth to it.
A variation of the big lie is the laundry list. List enough "evils," and even if proponents can reply to some of them, they will never be able to cover the entire list. This technique is most effective in debates, letters to the editor, and television news reports. Another variation is the simple statement that fluoridation doesn't work. Although recent studies show less difference than there used to be in decay rates between fluoridated and nonfluoridated communities, the benefit is still substantial. In fact, the Public Health Service estimates that every dollar spent for community fluoridation saves about fifty dollars in dental bills.

A key factor in any anti campaign is the use of printed matter. Because of this, antis are very eager to have their views printed. Scientific journals will rarely publish them, but most local newspapers are willing to express minority viewpoints regardless of whether facts support them. A few editors even welcome the controversy the antis generate -- expecting that it will increase readership.

The aim of anti "documents" is to create the illusion of scientific controversy. Often they quote statements that are out of date or out of context. Quotes from obscure or hard-to-locate journals are often used. Another favored tactic is to misquote a profluoridation scientist, knowing that even if the scientist protests, the reply will not reach all those who read the original misquote.

Half-truths are commonly used. For example, saying that fluoride is a rat poison ignores the fact that poison is a matter of dose. Large amounts of many substances -- even pure water -- can poison people. But the trace amount of fluoride contained in fluoridated water will not harm anyone.

"Experts" are commonly quoted. It is possible to find someone with scientific credentials who is against just about anything. Most "experts" who speak out against fluoridation, however, are not experts on the subject. There are, of course, a few dentists and physicians who oppose fluoridation. Some of them object to fluoridation as a form of government intrusion, even though they know it is safe and effective.
Innuendo is a technique that has broad appeal because it can be used in a seemingly unemotional pitch. Some antis admit that fluoridation has been found safe "so far," but claim that its long-range effects have "not yet" been fully explored. The waiting game is a related gambit in which antis suggest that waiting a bit longer will help to resolve "doubt" about fluoridation's safety. No doubt, some antis will continue to use this argument for a few hundred more years.

A few antis have offered a "reward" for proving that fluoridation is safe. During the 1970s, a $100,000 offer required the pros to post a bond "to cover any costs which the offerers of the reward might incur if the proof is deemed invalid." The offer did not state who would judge the evidence, but it was safe to assume that the antis themselves would have appointed the judges. If a suit had been filed to collect the reward, the court might have ruled that the offer was a gambling bet that should not be enforced by a court. Such a suit would have required at least $25,000 for the bond and legal fees. Even if it had been won, however, there was no assurance that the money would have been recovered from the individuals who sponsored the reward. Most of them were elderly and scattered widely throughout the United States and Canada. A woman who runs an antifluoridation Web site has issued two versions of a $100,000 reward. Initially, she promised the money for directing her to "any published scientific articles demonstrating the safety of our current fluoride intake or any studies which indicate that researchers used methods capable of detecting cases of chronic fluoride poisoning -- but failed to find them -- in any fluoridated U.S. cities in the past." The current version is for "any studies which indicate that researchers used methods capable of detecting cases of chronic fluoride poisoning in any U.S. city in the past -- but failed to find them." The offer does not state how any response would be judged or who would make the judgment. The Web site has carried a plea for help in defraying the $19.95 per month it cost to maintain it.

Since the scientific community is so solidly in favor of fluoridation, antis try to discredit it entirely by use of the conspiracy gambit. The beauty of the conspiracy charge is that it can be leveled at anyone and there is absolutely no way to disprove it. After all, how does one prove that something is not taking place secretly? Favorite "conspirators" are the U.S. Public Health Service, the American Dental Association, the American Medical Association, and the aluminum industry. Apparently, in the minds of the antis, these groups could all be working together to "poison" the American people! Years ago, conspiracy claims would work primarily with the very paranoid. But modern-day government scandals may make them seem realistic to a wider audience.

The "slippery slope" claim is a related gambit. "This is only the beginning!" the antis wail. "First they will add fluoride, then vitamin pills, and the next thing you know it will be birth control pills!" Who "they" are need not be specified.
Scare words will add zip to any anti campaign. Not only the more obvious ones like "cancer" and "heart disease," but also more specialized terms like "mongoloid births" and "sickle-cell anemia." Ecology words are also useful. Calling fluoride a "chemical" (rather than a nutrient) can strike fear in the minds of many Americans who fear we are already too "chemicalized." The fact that water itself is a chemical and the fact that responsible use of chemicals is extremely helpful to our society will not reassure everyone. Fluoride is also called "artificial" and "a pollutant," which is "against nature." Faced with the fact that fluoridation merely copies a natural phenomenon, the antis reply that "natural" fluoride differs from "artificial" fluoride -- a "fact" as yet undiscovered by scientists.

Suggesting alternatives is a common tactic. Here the antis propose that the community distribute free fluoride tablets to parents who wish to give them to their children. The suggested program sounds "democratic," but it will not be effective from a public health standpoint. Most parents are not motivated to administer the 4,000+ doses needed from birth through age twelve. The plea for alternatives is often made by a "neutral" individual who sounds like he will support an alternative program if water fluoridation is defeated. Don't bet on it. Such advocacy is almost always a propaganda ploy.

Once fluoridation has begun in a community, antis can resort to the "cause-of-all-evil" gambit -- blaming fluoridation for everything that occurred after it started. An example of this tactic, one that backfired on opponents, took place in Cleveland on June 1, 1956 -- when fluorides were to be added to the city's water supply. That day, the phone calls began: "My goldfish have died." "My African violets are wilting." "I can't make a decent cup of coffee." "My dog is constipated." Although the basis of such complaints is emotional rather than physical, this time fluoridation's innocence was beyond question. Last-minute problems had delayed its start until July!

"Let the People Decide"
The antis' most persuasive argument, both to legislators and to the general public, is to call for a public vote. On the surface, this appears to be the democratic way to settle the issue. But the antis are dealing from a stacked deck. First, the people who need fluoridation the most -- the children -- do not vote. Second, it is not difficult to confuse voters by flooding the community with scare propaganda. Average citizens do not have the educational background to sort out claim and counterclaim or to judge which "authorities" to believe. To turn against fluoridation, they don't need to accept all the anti arguments -- only one. The sheer bulk of the controversy is itself likely to arouse doubt in the minds of most voters.
Antis who say, "Let the people decide," may sound as if they wish to use a democratic process to make the decision, but experience in many cities has shown otherwise. If fluoridation wins a referendum, the usual anti response is to work for another one. In some communities that allow repeated referendums on the same subject, fluoridation has been in and out, and in and out again. When this happens, not only do children suffer, but taxpayers are saddled with the cost of the referendums.

Curiously, studies have shown that referendums can lose even in communities where public opinion favors fluoridation. People will usually go to the polls to vote against what they don't like. So the crucial factor in many referendums is the ability of proponents to mobilize the supporters. A 1998 Gallup Poll commissioned by the American Dental Association found that when asked "Do you believe community water should be fluoridated?" 70% of respondents believed that community water should be fluoridated, 18% did not, and 12% were undecided. Yet small numbers of vocal critics still manage to impede its implementation in many communities.

Cancer Scares
In the mid-1970s, John Yiamouyiannis, Ph.D. and another anti began issuing a series of reports claiming that fluoridation causes cancer. Experts concluded that these reports were based on a misinterpretation of government statistics. They had compared cancer death rates in fluoridated and nonfluoridated cities but failed to consider various factors in each city (such as industrial pollution) that are known to raise the cancer death rate. By 1977, independent investigations by eight of the leading medical and scientific organizations in the English-speaking world had refuted the claims, but they still surface today in many communities that consider fluoridation.

In 1990, the cancer charge was raised again following an unauthorized release of data from an experiment in which rats and mice were exposed to high dosages of fluoride. The experiment was conducted by the National Toxicology Program, a branch of the National Institute of Environmental Health Sciences. The agency's final report stated that there was no evidence of cancer-causing activity in female rats or in male and female mice and only "equivocal evidence" in male rats. Subsequent review by a U.S. Public Health Service expert panel concluded that the data were insignificant and that fluoridation posed no risk of cancer or any other disease.

Don't Be Misled
As a public health measure, fluoridation is unusual in several ways. It is a copy of a naturally occurring phenomenon. It is supported by libraries full of articles that document its safety and effectiveness -- more so than any other public health measure. It is supported by a variety of health, scientific, and civic groups that could hardly be expected to agree on any other single measure. But most significant, it is the only health measure that is often put to public vote.
If you live in a community with fluoridated water, consider yourself lucky. If you do not, don't let the poisonmongers scare you. Fluoridation is still a modern health miracle.

Monday, November 14

Bad Modem

Sorry, I REALLY try to update the blog everyday (and if this one isn’t- one of my others probably was) BUT… our modem went out at home and we’re waiting to get it replaced so I have no internet access there right now. I’ve been SUPER productive at work so I haven’t been online during business hours and now I am having withdrawals. Funny thing is we went YEARS without internet at home and even at work I’ve only had it for a couple of years and now I can barely stand going a day without having it. Mostly I want to post my pictures- I have so many great ones from this weekend (so stay tuned).

Anyway, I feel really out-of-touch when I haven’t checked the blogs in a few days. I love finding out what is going on with everyone and obviously I like sharing my thoughts, stories, insights, whatever (nonsense mostly). I’ve almost gotten to the point that I barely send personal emails now- everything gets covered in the blog. But I try to maintain my personal relationships- I’d just rather do it in person now. That or we’ll take a posting off-line and email back and forth about it.

But I do have to say this- I may be doing some clean-up on my links soon… T-Man-Clan, you’ve been slackin’ in the updating. SOS, you’re out of town now but even before that we haven’t seen anything new in AWHILE. Now I may remember that you’all might be having password issues- may I suggest starting over? Something to consider. Now some of you might say you’re too busy to get around to blogging- I get that and you’re excused but don’t neglect the blog for too long- it is too much fun!

Friday, November 11

Golden Opp Lost

Aren't these lil' guys so cute? They were left at a friend of a sister's doorstep (that is so sad to me). They are free to a good home so if you're interested let me know and I'll put you into contact with the foster parents. We're considering one, but we really shouldn't. I understand whichever ones don't get adopted with go to the pound and that brakes my heart. We'll see.

Thursday, November 10

Mom Job Description

POSITION :Mother, Mom, Mama, Mommy, Ma

JOB DESCRIPTION:Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work in an often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call. Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities. Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required.

RESPONSIBILITIES :The rest of your life. Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5. Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case, this time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers. Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of multiple homework projects. Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks. Must be willing to be indispensable one minute, an embarrassment the next. Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end product. Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility.

POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION: Virtually none. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you

PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE : None required unfortunately. On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.

WAGES AND COMPENSATION:Get this! You pay them! Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent. When you die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.

BENEFITS : While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth and free hugs for life if you play your cards right.Forward this on to all the Moms you know, in appreciation for everything they do on a daily basis, and let them know they are appreciated

Remember this motto to live by (also found on Pixie's link):"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO what a ride!"

Wednesday, November 9

Christmas is Coming

I'm so excited. So much to do….

Decorate
Clean Carpets
Shop Till I Drop (for ideas)
Make a Budget
Define a Wish List
Shop Till I Drop (spend $)
Go Crazy Finding the Perfect Something for Everone
Wrap it all up in a Frenzy (I wait till the last minute)
Host Christmas at Our House (for the 1st time)
Remember to Keep the Meaning of the Holiday
Do Fun Christmas Activities
Bake Cake for Jesus
Ect Ect

I love to buy gifts for people. Finding that something special that is both personal and thoughtful just is so much fun for me. We're always on a budget so I try really hard to get the most bang for my buck while focusing on the wants and needs/taste of the person I'm buying for.

My first gift on the list is now for my niece Maddy. I don't have a daughter of my own (which kills me) so buying for little girls is especially fun. I found a set of Disney Princess Wigs that I know she'll love (and they come in this cute hat box too). Don't laugh, wigs are cool and every girl has wanted one (or more). But the biggest reason more girls don’t have them is because they’re unusual and not a popular gift to give- that's exactly what I'm looking for. I can't wait to order it but I know I have time and I'll continue to look for the best price/free shipping.

Have you started your shopping? What gift stands out most on you list? I'm brainstorming early but buying late ($$$). That's okay, if I buy too early I tend to overbuy. Anyway, I like the rush I get towards the end when I set out to make my final purchases (either at the store or online) and by shopping around I get really great deals (avoiding that buyer's remorse we all dread).

Tuesday, November 8

ER the TV series

I really like ER (the TV show). I’ve watched it since the first season. I didn’t so much love the last few seasons but I have to say it has now done a good job of picking up the pace and getting onto better storylines. I record this show and watch it when I can, the Captain doesn’t like it much so I try to watch it once the kids are down and when he has something else he’d rather be doing. I finally watched this last episode and was impressed. They have a great cast now (John Leguizamo for one and the chick from 3rd Rock too) and this episode was totally fresh- I mean it had monkeys (well actually chimpanzees), a Dr. Robot (that got locked up and cussed at), and a 14 year old sleeping with a Dr. that had NO IDEA she was so young. She (the 14 year old) looked A LOT like Hillary Duff and I think it might have been, that or her sister. If it was that’s funny because they joked about Hillary Duff on the show. Another storyline had me crying (about a son and an estranged Father) when it took a twist I didn’t see coming.

All in all, I’m impressed. We’ll miss this series when it is gone, I think it gets taken for granted because it has been on for so long.

Do you watch it? Did you?

Monday, November 7

In My Crazy Head

I have so much going on in my head at any given time (most of it relates to the role I “play” in this silly ole’ life of mine).

Generic stuff as follows...
I should have dressed up more, I need new (fill in the blank), my hair doesn't look right- why do I feel like a scrub all the time? I should do something about it. What? Oh well, I don't care. I'm going to go broke trying to make myself look better for people who love me for me and those who don't- well who cares what they think anyway (obviously I do- but I don't want to). I try hard to craft a casual but somewhat stylish look on a budget but sometimes I dream of clothing that is more trendy and feminine, that requires dry-cleaning/ironing, that looks striking. But who has the money for dry-cleaning on a weekly basis and ironing is not something I want to make time for- I don’t like to iron. Maybe that is why I’m always messing with my hair? I like to make a statement with my appearance besides I’m taking it easy today. That and I like to be unpredictable- the whole day-in/day-out monotony kills me.

Other stuff...
Laughter- I love laughter (but not my own). Why do I have to make that odd sound when I start laughing loudly? I'm croaking. Well I suppose it is better than farting. You know how some people fart when the laugh or sneeze- I suppose that could happen.

Other other stuff...
What time is it? Am I way behind the schedule? Where's my internal clock? Why don't I have one? I totally do not have a feeling for how much time passes in any given circumstances.

Then there's the serious stuff...
Mom stuff, Wife stuff, Life as a Christian stuff, Time Management stuff, Homeowner stuff, Money stuff, Work stuff, Church stuff...

And that is just a little of what goes on in my head, I can spend seconds/minutes/hours reflecting on all the aspects of my life and the lives of those I care about. I'm always evaluating and learning- I do not lead a life unexamined by any means that is for sure. Does that make me sick? maybe.

What goes on in your head? Tag you're it.

Sunday, November 6

Back 2 Normal

Wow, what a whirlwind week. My first time traveling BY MYSELF (hey I'm a twin, I've NEVER had to do anything by myself) went off without a hitch. I have to say, it went well. I mean IT WENT WELL!!! The location, the hotel, the people- they were all far better than I had hoped for. I learned so much too, I even dreamed about my training last night- I have alot of ideas for implementing this new software and because I'm an odd bird- I'm really looking forward to it. Anything that is a break from the norm is good from time to time. I mean I like my norm, I require a "norm" but I like to do things outside of what I normally do because I guess I get a little stir crazy. That and taking a step back really makes you appreciate it all that much more.

My boys (husband included) made me feel so loved and appreciated. Coming back felt good. I suppose I can't complain about a thing.

Today we even got MORE yard work done, went to the lake for a picnic, visited the Captain's Mom and wrapped up everything at a decent hour. Life is GOOD!!!

So did you miss me? I didn't have internet access so I've been TOTALLY out of touch. I can't wait to visit everyone's blogs to see what has been going on while I've been gone.