Gifs are Gifts from Heaven

Don't you just LOVE clipart? I do. But what I am REALLY CRAZY about gifs. This site doesn't deal with gifs well (the animated clipart) so I don't get to use them as often as I'd like. As far as clipart, I was sad when I lost all my collected clipart in my computer upgrade because now I have to start from scrach and I don't really have the time. Oh well.

Back to the topic, if you like gifs too- go to this website http://www.animationfactory.com/newsletter.html and subscribe. They'll send you a newsletter from time to time and you can save the gifs off of them. They have some GREAT ones.

Improvements by the Yard

Got to some much needed yardwork completed today. Last weekend that was the plan but... so this weekend we caught up (for the most part). It was so BEAUTIFUL outside that I totally cannot complain, it was heaven. I raked and it went pretty fast, this new rake is so much better (the right tools make all the difference). Anyway, it felt like a good workout and made a huge improvement on the appearance of the front of our house.

SUCH AN IMPROVEMENT in fact that I did something TOTALLY out of my character and spent money on further improvements that we don't have- IE: went to Home Depot and bought stuff on the credit card/its not gonna get paid off till December type splurge BUT... it looks like our Christmas bonus should be enough to cover a decent Christmas and then some so I sort-of see that spending as a gift to us in advance. We spent around $80 and got soooo much in return.

A couple of years ago we painted all the wood on our house. It helped update the look alot. We used a latte color and I really like it. We also tore out 85% of the bushes and planted some more (like 20+) to take their place. We bought the cheapest we could find- small box woods and used the most economical border- the green metal and went to town. It was a HUGE undertaking. We have a 80 foot high (something around that anyway) Maple with VERY hard and big and numerous roots that have totally over taken our ENTIRE yard. Digging in our flowerbeds was NOT easy. We used drills and wedges and saws (don't ask) and some of the boxwoods just didn't make it despite our best efforts. We tried some other types- some "took" but the amount of work/time invested never really showed. So now this past year we get a new roof, repaired our fence and I'm thinkin' we're on our way right- well not as much as I wanted, the impact was just below my expectations.

SO TODAY, we go and get some more shrubs (like 7 or so, 3 different types) and we buy tons of dirt (like 250 lbs worth- it is nice having an Excursion) and we build up our flower beds. We uproot some of the boring/dying boxwoods that were all lined up and we put in mounts and w/in the mounds we planted our various selections. The idea was stolen from Mike's coworker that has a yard (and house) that I WOULD DIE FOR. Well, as I was saying- I am so happy with the outcome I want to burst (another $100 and it would look AMAZING but still I think right now it looks good).

No regrets- I just wish we would have done it sooner. The best part was the whole family was involved and we all had a great time working together- no tension, no stress- just happiness. Happy Day.

For Ree...

I'm still learning how to fix it-

the Captain likes it flat and I tend to want to spike it out.

I wish it would dry staight but oh well.

My camera was on the wrong setting, but you get the gist.

The side pieces were longer but I cut them.

A friend mentioned they looked a little detached

and I agreed. You know me, can't leave well enough alone.

Hope you like.

Just Cut It OFF

I did it, I cut it. Last cut was good but I really think this cut is great. I mean I got what I wanted- a totally different look.

I wanted something that would be easy and look good with little effort. I have that type of hair that does what you want it too BUT you have to spend time on it. That’s why the long hair thing doesn’t work for me. I’m not willing to consistently fix it. Sure the pony tail thing is cool but it gets old. I just needed a change. That’s when I got my last cut. But I held back and kept some of the length and the whole thing was growing out and ONCE AGAIN I was getting lazy with it/not fixing it.

This night I went in for a short bob. Wanted it cropped right at the neckline in the back (thinned out at the ends) and then blended with the slightly longer hair in the front. But my stylist either misunderstood me or I had more layers than I thought because it looked stacked- like it looked like a not my ethnicity type cut. No, that isn’t going to work. I want edgy, I want a rockerish style but NOT stacked in the back with hair too long in the front. I felt like I looked like one of the members of TLC in the early 90s.

My stylist looked wounded when I said I hated it. I didn’t mean to be so blunt but I was SO DISAPPOINTED. I was caught off guard and when I described what I didn’t like about it- I ended it with a JUST CUT IT ALL SHORT. She seemed to want to talk me out of it. I was not going to budge.

I’m thinkin’ shorter hair needs to be all one length (pixie like), not cropped in the back and now I have to do what I sort-of wanted to do anyway- cut it all off. She cut it again. I’m still saying it is too long. She was surprised. I forgot my pictures but I tell her to think Pixie. I’m sure she assumes I’m just TOTALLY FREAKED OUT and she doesn’t want me to do something I’ll regret. I already did- I didn’t bring my pictures.

She starts cutting again. Okay, this doesn’t suck but I’m not impressed. If I’m not impressed when I walk out of the salon I’m probably going to be a total mess by the time I get home. I say to cut more, thin it out more, I need it to be interesting- not run of the mill 30 something short because I have no style or imagination. Keep cutting.

She does and I’m coming around. 4 times she cut it. Now I can go home without crying. I call the Captain on the way home and he’s so sweet. I’m almost crying because the whole thing was STRESSFUL. My stylist is so nice and I felt bad and I wasn’t prepared and…. In anycase, Captain builds me up and I’m feeling better. He claims to LOVE it when I get home and that makes me feel A LOT better.

Haven’t gotten any other great reviews but I know you take a chance when you go drastic. We’ll see. If they don’t like it today, I’ll style it differently tomorrow and with a cut this short- it will look very different in a month when it is growing out.

The best part- all the dyed hair is GONE. I’m natural FINALLY. The silver (to me) looks pretty now because it isn’t just in the roots. It reminds me of my Dad and I love that. Just one more neat thing I got from my Father- pretty silver hair (just didn’t expect so much of it at 28).

Yeah Right

http://www.cbc.ca/story/world/national/2005/10/27/miers051027.html
Miers withdraws as nominee for U.S Supreme Court
Last Updated Thu, 27 Oct 2005 12:40:10 EDT
CBC News

Controversial U.S. Supreme Court nominee Harriet Miers has withdrawn her nomination after weeks of criticism over her qualifications for the role.

White House counsel Harriet Miers listens to President Bush in the Oval Office at the time of her nomination, Monday, Oct. 3. (AP Photo/Ron Edmonds)

Miers said in a statement her nomination "would create a burden for the White House and our staff that is not in the best interest of the country."

President George W. Bush has "reluctantly" accepted her letter of withdrawal, White House officials said.

Miers, who most recently served as Bush's White House counsel, was nominated less than a month ago to replace retiring Justice Sandra Day O'Connor.

But she has been widely criticized since her nomination, notably by some conservatives who said she lacked the necessary legal credentials and a record of conservative judicial philosophy on issues such as abortion and affirmative action.

Others accused Bush of cronyism.

Bush blamed her withdrawal on Senate pressure on the White House to release internal documents concerning Miers.

"It is clear that senators would not be satisfied until they gained access to internal documents concerning advice provided during her tenure at the White House – disclosures that would undermine a president's ability to receive candid counsel," Bush said.

Miers also noted efforts by the Senate to retrieve White House records. "I have been informed repeatedly that in lieu of records, I would be expected to testify about my service in the White House to demonstrate my experience and judicial philosophy," she said in the statement.
"While I believe that my lengthy career provides sufficient evidence for consideration of my nomination, I am convinced the efforts to obtain executive branch materials and information will continue."

Too Long...

#1- I like the slicked back on the sides look.

#2 I like the longer on top rock look.

#3 I like the thinned out fall forward look.

#4 I like this short bob.

#5 I like this pixie aloof cut too.

What do you think? I want a change and this cut that I have just isn't doin' it for me. I want to stop coloring it and let the gray finish growning in (versus the roots being 2 inches long) so short makes sense. Plus the back getting longer and with the sides shorter, it is feeling a little mulletish to me- that's not good. Be honest and know that while all your thoughts, comments, suggestions are respected- some may not be carried out. That's me. I take it all in and then the my own thing. But give me something to consider ;)

Plastic

I want plastic surgery. It is true, having children has come at a price and when I see myself in the mirror after a shower- I’m not pleased. I don’t hate myself, I don’t think I’m disgusting- but I do know from watching the many many shows on TV about plastic surgery that that extra skin could be taken away. I know my hips are wider and I can live with that but why have that extra skin when it wouldn’t be that difficult to free myself of it.

Here I am, one of the cheapest people I know, saying I really want to spend the money on plastic surgery.

Would I regret it- probably. Would I feel awful about spending the money- yes (unless I sacrificed above and beyond in other ways to save for it). Would I hate myself during recovery for being so vain- ABSOLUTELY!

So why do I still want to do it, because 2 months later I would be able to go to the store and try on pants and not worry about the low rise ones accenting my love handles, the high rise ones accenting my tummy, etc etc. I use to have a body that looked good in clothes and shopping was something I enjoyed. Now I’m running out of jeans and TOTALLY dreading the trying on process. I can find stuff when I look hard and try on everything that might be a possibility- but you’re talking about spending like 3 hours to get maybe 3 or 4 items.

People say work out- I was and yeah there was a difference but not a significant one. Besides, people say to read your bible too and between work at work, work at home, trying to set apart time for family and all of that- the bible reading is difficult enough (and more important). There just doesn’t seem to be enough hours in the day.

So yeah, I said Bible. I am a Christian and I know better. Before I would go through with it I would look up scripture and see if there were any way to justify this procedure. I’m sure I’d find that there isn’t and that it isn’t good. In fact, I’m sure there are tons of verses talking about body mutilation and the dangers of being vain.

Still, taking a few inches off the waisteline sounds good.

If I were rich, I’d do more. I’d do as much as possible right up to the point of looking plastic. It isn’t that I think we should all look the same, it is just that I think we should look our best if looking our best makes us feel better. Happiess should come from other places but honestly, have you seen people who have just lost a lot of weight- THEY ARE HAPPY.

So what are your thoughts on plastic surgery? Love it? Hate it? Understand the appeal but wouldn't do it (that's likely where I'm at).

Do you watch the shows? I had to stop. It was making me crazy.

Sick

So I'm sick. Not I'm going to die sick, not even I can't move sick- but too sick to think right and too sick to do anything requiring more energy than say- walking across a room type sick. I'm that type of sick where you're TIRED and your head, ears, throat and just about everything else hurts. Took Big Kid to the Dr because he was high fever and vomiting sick this weekend and woke up with soars on his mouth. Seen that before, make the appt and find out he's got strep. I make an appointment for myself because I get strep very easily and as I said before- my throat hurts. Dang it.

Go to the Dr and find out I DON'T HAVE IT. Man, I hate to waste that $15 copay- but I didn't. He reinforced that I WAS SICK just told me I have to wait it out. That and I got my flu shot- so that was good (and it didn't even hurt).

3 days of being at home for the better part of the day and 3 days where we couldn't really get anything done. Wanted to spend a couple hours cleaning the carpets- didn't. Wanted to go through the boys clothes and clear out the stuff they don't wear/are too small- didn't (well we got our closet cleaned up so...). Wanted to rake and have the lawn in good shape- it isn't. But we did do lots of laundry. Of course alot of it was a result of the sick stuff needing to be cleaned up but oh well.

I want to clean, I want to file, I want to do something productive but... I can't. I'm tired.

Maybe getting sick is God's way of saying REST.

Dress Up

I was side tracked when I was talking to JT and Pixie, I started referring to Mean Girls in regards to Halloween and never completed the thought.

So… the main girl gets invited to a costume party. Her secret goth friend helps her put a really scary unattractive bride of Frankenstein costume together. She looks disgusting, a good costume but really scary and gross. When she arrives at the party she is so uncomfortable…

Cady: [voiceover] Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like total sluts and no other girls can say anything about it.

This truth is known by most women. We generally like to pick out costumes that enhance what we got (if you know what I mean), sometimes we are obvious about it- kittens, maids, etc. Sometimes we’re subtle but us ladies don’t usually like to look unattractive regardless. Now being a Mom doesn’t change that. Most Moms don’t want to look slutty but we’re still women, we still want to be attractive. That’s where Halloween becomes a challenge. We have to wear stuff that we can bend over in, stuff that we can stand next to our child in and look respectable but we don’t want to look boring, stuffy, or unimaginative (in otherwords we don’t want to look too Mom-ish). Finding the right balance is difficult and matters are made worse when not everyone dresses up. Do you want to be the sideline Mom that doesn’t engage (NO WAY) but you also don’t want to be the “its all about me” Mom either. Finding a common theme helps. That’s why to the costume party we’re attending I am more and more certain we’ll all be something related to fire- big kid is the Human Torch, lil’ one is fire, and we’ll be burned out.

Got some fleece that I’m going to work a flame theme into for lil’ one. No sewing required (yeah). We’ll get out some safety pines, some glue and scissors and try to make it work. $8 later if it doesn’t- there’s always his last year's costume OR maybe he’ll even fit into one of Kole’s previous ones (like the one he never wore).

No Go- Oh No

So the creative thing may be overrated. I’ve been trying to come up with a SPECIFIC idea for weeks now and while I have some guidelines as to what I want, I’m still not sure just how I am going to make my ideas work. First of all, the reason I was going to get creative with Jack’s costume is because he doesn’t really know that he has a say in what he’s going to be- that and he hasn’t shown much of an interest in being anything in particular. So it seemed like the perfect situation to impose my will- yeah, I like to have things my way.

EXCEPT, my lil’ one is very opinionated on things and while he doesn’t have an opinion on what he wants to be- I’m pretty sure he’ll have an opinion about what he DOESN’T want to be. He won’t want to wear a hat/head covering or have his face painted, he won’t want to be hot and if anything can be “picked” of his costume, it probably will be. He’s just picky that way (ha ha).

Here’s where the night went wrong… We’re tired, too many late nights and too much to do- not a good time to go shopping. We have no time- this event is tomorrow and the time is ticking away tonight. I haven’t said a word to the Captain about my creative ideas- he doesn’t really enjoy the blog thing so I’m lucky if he reads it 2 times a month…. He’s sort-of caught off guard. He doesn’t love the side of me that makes things more difficult/complicated/elaborate than they have to be so this is not something he’s relating to the appeal of. But he wants to be a good sport.

We get to Target, return the store bought costume I originally bought (Jack didn’t like it after all) and we go to the clothes section. I was going to start with a white or black top and bottom set and build from there. But they don’t have his size, dang Wal-Mart didn’t either. Hmm…. Improvise. I see PJs- but the fuzzy ones with feet don’t seem to logical and the colors aren’t right anyway. I see PJs that are in sets of tops and bottoms. They have blue and red ones with bugs- bugs/critters… this can work. Let’s build on this. Captain confirms my worst fears by saying he doesn’t think this is going to work- its going to look cheap and homemade (and will likely cost more to make).

Okay- lets look at the costume section (again)- Jack is interested in nothing. The Captain starts getting more into it and has some suggestions but we’re not really getting there. We decide to check out Michaels for crafty ideas but miss the turn and go to Party City instead. It was REALLY busy. Nothing stood out. We decide to go creative because Jack saw a bag of eyeballs that he liked and we try to think of a way to dress him up as a piece of candy and put eyeballs on it- that way he could be eye candy. But the candy portion of the costume seems to be too difficult to pull off for lil’ one. All our ideas are coming up short. I see these cool spiders that I thought I could incorporate into a costume idea but Jack is pretty scared of bugs, spiders, well most things. We go to Michaels- traffic is bad (on a Thursday night- go figure) and Michaels is bare- they have NOTHING. We go home empty handed.

Tonight he’ll wear last year's costume (never thought I’d reuse old costumes but here I am doing it) and I’ll keep thinkin’ about a way to do my crispy critter. I’ve got one idea I dig but maybe not for a kid- now you have to promise not to steal it…

Fall guy- (buy leaves from Micheals and decorate yourself in an Autumn theme- a “fall” theme)

That or the burnt out idea is still good to me. The Captain and I might wear business clothes that are all burned up and do our makeup to look all tired and we’ll just be burnt out. I’ve always found reality more interesting that fiction anyway.

Tonight We Make a Costume

I love Halloween but I don't think people have to try as hard now to come up with cool costumes. Back when I was a kid, a store bought costume was something everyone laughed at, the creative ones were the best. But the store ones are really cool now so I can see the appeal of purchasing one but I'm a sucker for seeing what people can create themselves.

So I've decided to try and be creative with the lil' ones'

(while he can't complain too much about not looking like everyone else). Here's some ideas I'm working off of for my Crispy Critter..

Tonight we're going to go shopping to buy stuff so his costume will be ready for tomorrow's Halloween thing up at Dad's recovery place.

I know I want him to look bug like or little critterish- a tail would be cool, a head thing isn't likely going to be worn for long and he doesn't really like things that aren't as they should be so hopefully what we come up with will work.

We might just burn up some clothes and make him all ashy- and have him be burned out. I'm not sure about this idea because it doesn't seem too kidlike and I want him to like his costume. I love the idea of working his costume with his brothers- the Human Torch.

What was your best Homemade costume- mine was Sleepy (as in Snow White and the 7 dwarfs). I had the big ears, floppy hat, potato sac shoes and a long droopy robe with oversized white mittens and super long eyelashes. I LOVED IT.

Never Would Have Thought...

I let my kids sleep with me and I don't care what people think. I love to snuggle with them, I love spending that time with them (they say the cutest things drifting off to sleep and I'm able to make sure they settle down and sleep), and no I don't expect it to last forever. Yes when the time comes and they aren't my little boys- I'll put my foot down and have them sleep in their own beds. I am aware it might be difficult and I am willing to cross that bridge when we get there. No I don't have a specific timeline but it will be sooner rather than later but I'm not going to rush it.

Besides, there are logistics to consider. We have two comfortable beds (well they are sleepable beds but I wouldn’t say comfortable) so I sleep in one and the Captain in the other. I’m not including the bunk beds on purpose because the boys don’t like sleeping in them and I wonder if they ever will- oh well they look cute. Anyway, the Captain sleeps in a separate bed because he snores and hasn't gone to the Dr. yet to resolve the issue. That and he wakes up earlier so and doesn’t like me to pester him about getting up (and letting me sleep). Not to mention we're a lil' big to sleep in a full size bed together every night so we just don't sleep well together. That and he often stays up later playing video games or reading and I need silence/darkness to fall into my slumber. That and... well as you can see I don't do much without thinking it out. This wasn't the plan but when it fell into a routine for us after years of resisting it- I've found out that it isn't so bad and it solved more problems than created.

One day the Captain will go to the Dr and resolve the snoring concerns, he’ll go to bed earlier, and we'll have a bed we can both sleep together in comfortably. One day my boys will be more independent and while it will kill me I will encourage it. One day...

Yeah and married people don't HAVE to sleep together to have a "healthy" relationship- so that isn't really a factor/concern incase you were wonderin'.

Do I sound defensive? It is because I am. Never in a million years would I have expected this situation to work out for us like this- I use to give the Captain such a bad time for not going to sleep with me when I was tired (and he wasn't), for not waking up with me (even though our schedules were different), snuggling with me (when he wanted space), etc etc. But after years of not seeing eye to eye, having kids too smart to stay in the crib, being to tired to force them to go back to their beds (we REALLY value our sleep).... If I sound like I'm defending this setup, it is because unless you know all the details- you probably don't get it and I get that. But I don't like to be misunderstood.

Good Food

I love good food and I’m not picky- there isn’t much out there that I don’t like. Last night the hubby made shrimp in alfredo sauce, french bread buttered and cooked with lots of garlic, and the most delicious thing he’s made as of yet- scallions fried in sesame oil (with lots of garlic too). It was AMAZING. But I have to say, all the work sort-of backfired. I ate and ate and drank and drank and the combo left me feeling a lil’ worse for the wear. Poor guy- he took the kids shopping to buy all this wonderful food, was preparing for me when I got home, had straightened the house, and basically worked his butt off to make me feel loved and he ended up with a wife feeling too junky to be any fun. What a good husband, what a bummer of a wife. I’ll have to come up with some way to show my appreciation in return…

Anyway, I enjoy cooking but only when I can afford to buy the ingredients without feeling bad and if I’m cooking something I couldn’t eat out. The best days to cook are the lazy ones. You’ve been lounging and taking it easy, you get out some cookbooks, find the yummiest of recipes, go shopping, come home and go to town (cooking). No rushing, no worries, you just enjoy the process. Now in 8 years of marriage- that’s happened about 10 times and most of those were BK (before kids). Life gets busy and food isn’t a high priority to me. I’d rather throw in a bag of prepared stir fry with low fat ingredients and add a lil’ something here and there (peanut butter being a favorite). That way I don’t feel fat for eating it, it is an easy cleanup, there’s no defrosting/preparing/planning/stressing and it costs less than fast food. But that’s just me- what about you?

TV

Okay so TinTin took my topic for the day- what’s your favorite show on TV? For me there are a few right now that I’m recording/watching…
UFC (on Spike)
LOST
My Name is Earl
The Office
Miami Ink

Fastforwarding through commericals cuts down on TV time but man- there are just too many good shows on. A month ago I wasn’t watching but maybe 1 hour a week of TV (not counting kid stuff).

But what has been your ALL TIME FAVORITE SHOW? What show did you want to never go off the air. What show did you have to talk about with all your friends. Last year it was Nip/Tuck for me. I still love it but it is so bad that I couldn’t have the kids ANYWHERE around and a few times when we thought they were down for the night- they'd walk by and see something crazy. I felt so bad that I decided that something so bad for them to see probably isn’t good for me to see. That and the storylines really got to me. Like the sadness of some of them would bum me out for DAYS (same thing with 6 Feet Under).

Anyway- all time GOOD shows…
LA Law comes to mind. I also loved Homefront or was it Homeplace? They had great actors and really interesting story lines. I learned a lot from both shows and at the same time just really enjoyed watching them. I suppose I was at that impressionable stage where both aspects appealed to me.

There was the tried and true 90210 and Melrose Place of course- what else though? Oh ER. Is that still on? I need to set the timer if so- I’ve watched it since day 1. We can't forget Friends either or Cheers- that brings me to Night Court.

In the childhood times I couldn’t miss Punky Brewster (and I often still think of various episodes with that darn Margo and sweet Cherry- not to mention Punky’s “Dad” Mr. Henry). I watched Saved by the Bell but I always thought it was pretty dumb.

Okay folks- it’s TV time, give your 2 cents worth.

California Knows How to Party

Keep it rockin’
in the city of Compton

Yeah, my big bro had me scared. He asked where I was going in CA. I didn’t know. I said it was close to the LAX airport- he commented that the City of Compton was near the airport. Huh? Really? Wow. Okay, lots of cities are close to LAX. No need for alarm, no need to worry. Okay, I'm worried. I must look into the details. Initially I wasn’t that interested, I mean I have to travel ALONE for goodness sakes and I have to be away from my kids. I've never been away from them (Kole traveled with my parents two times I think years ago and there has been an overnight thing here and there but I've never left my kids at home while I went away). Now I know the Captain will be there but Mommies are important. Mommies are needed. What will they do? I'm overvaluing myself huh?

Anyway, the training on this software (that I know very little about) sounds pretty tough too so I'm also concerned about that. The whole thing sounded like lots of opportunities for things to go wrong. But that is the worrier in me.

Yesterday at Church I (well the whole congregation) was told NOT to worry. I always justify my worries but calling them concerns but I know that isn’t really the point. So I’ll follow my Dad’s words of wisdom and I won’t borrow trouble.

Now I’m not worried, I’m in fact trying to get excited. Trying to get excited about staying on the beach, in the middle of great places to shop and wonderful places to eat (well at least the City’s Website said so). We’ll see. In anycase I should come out ahead on the amount of money they give you a day to spend- I’m so cheap (and so poor) that every penny counts.

Plus, I suppose in the least this will be a great learning experience. My heart is already aching at the idea of being away from my boys though. Have I said it enough- I am not so sure about being away from my boys?

Office Politics

I don't think I get too involved in office politics- I try to be nice to everyone and I work pretty hard. I have my days when buckling down is more difficult than others but all in all I think I'm a good worker and have earned my pay/position.

Having said that I have very little “political pull”. I’m part of 2 departments, one of which is part of 3 that my primary boss is now over (as of last week) and what I do compared to his day-to-day concerns is pretty insignificant.

I understand and I try to keep the big picture in mind by staying out of his hair but it is a delicate matter. So I try to rush through explanations and end up talking more than I would otherwise because I'm trying too hard.

So anyway, I suppose I'm perceived as a "talker"- someone that needs to simplify her point/get to work. Well, my job/my "expertise" is related to details and details often are the places that I need input on or insight... so it is a catch 22.

Having said that, I've decided with a heavy heart not to get involved in the Chili Cookoff this year primarily because there are too many people (if someone has to bow out it might as well be me). We're called to sacrifice right so I suppose I’ll be the first. It is just that I'm afraid that any time I would put into the decorations (my main interest in the Chili Cookoff) might be seen as a waste of time (like I'm not busy enough or focusing on the things I should be). My boss doesn't like the Chili Cookoff and it occurred to me that it might not be a good idea to commit to something that your boss doesn't support.

Still I hate not being involved in things like this. Last year we quickly found a theme and went to work making it work. Everyone contributed and even though we didn't win- it was a great experience.

If you work for my company and you're reading this- please know (and pass one if anyone asks) the reason I'm giving for not participating in the first place is for the most logical reason and the first one I stated- there are too many people on our team. I'm also relaying that I'm just really busy (something I think might not be understood if I were working on the Chili Cookoff stuff- especially to the degree that you know I would because I can't do things 1/2 way).

So now I need to obsess about something new- maybe it will actually be work? AutoEDMS here I come, are you ready for this? Creating forms, implementing procedures, ahhh I can't wait.

Impact

Our message today was about impact. It has me thinking. What can I do to make a greater impact on this world? There are small things like not littering. This small rule of mine ensures that none of the garbage you see on the side of the road is a result of my thoughtlessness. Another small impact might be not cussing. I'm not saying I never do but I avoid it and I think keeping my language clean keeps others around me from having to feel uncomfortable (don't you hate the f-bomb getting dropped every other word?). It sounds so vulgar- like that person has nothing else going on in their mind than that adjective. You've got the examples of keeping commitments, cleaning up after yourself, giving others a reason to smile, raising your kids to respect others, maintaining your home to enhance the neighborhood's image, the list goes on and on. We all make an impact- some are good and some are bad. If you don't have a plan, a higher calling, that impact is more likely to be bad.

But like my fav short film Bouncin' says- you can do more, you can reach great heights, in fact you can soar. You just get a leg up and ya slap it on down, and you’ll find you’re up in what’s called a bound....
And I think you can do it if you give it a try.

So what are some of the ways I'm going to improve my impact- I'm going to treat my husband more lovingly. I'm going to try to get my point across at work without getting defensive. I'm going to see serving others as an opportunity and gift rather than a "have to" type deal. I'm going to use my time more wisely. I had found myself into a good habit of not going out on my lunch break- this allowed me to keep up on paperwork, our budget, bills, correspondences, and other things that get put off if you don't have a plan. So more restraint on my part in managing my time should be my best way of improving my impact. Other than that- I really can't say. Working full time and raising two kids sort-of takes up the biggest part of my day. My goal of getting more informed on local political issues is still there- maybe in about 4 or 5 year I will more seriously commit to that.

How about you? What's your greatest impact- was it in the past, something you're doing right now, or something you plan to do in the future?

Grief (a sample of what the Bibles says)

found from http://bible.com/answers/agrief.html

Proverbs 15:14 tells us that if we have God's understanding, we can ask Him for the knowledge to overcome every trial and problem we face. God is bigger than our grief, sorrow, pain and every problem that any of us could face. We must never blame Him for our troubles, as the devil is the trouble maker, not our Lord. God is there for us, to help us overcome anything the enemy has done, or is trying to do. God is the one that will rescue us and help us in our hour of need. However, we must not be like the fool who feeds on his folly. This is a person who is continually mouthing his troubles and blaming others, including God, for his circumstances. He feeds on self-pity and rehearses his problems to all who will listen. We must give our heartaches and troubles to God and keep a cheerful attitude no matter what is going on in our lives. We need to remember, "this too, shall pass" as God is eternal and has a good plan for our future.

As Christians, death is the last enemy we face, as we have the assurance that we shall see all of our loved ones who have died in Christ once again. The devil may have snatched them off this earth, but because they belong to God, He snatches them from the devil and takes them home with him. We will be reunited with them. That shall happen when we get to Heaven, or when Christ comes again to this earth and brings them with Him at the resurrection. We are not like those who have no hope. In Christ, our future is full of His promises and we are promised victory over death and the grave!

Tough

Life is tough. We deal with so much- the stuff that seems to matter most often doesn't matter much at all, it is the stuff we don't plan on. I just recently did a posting on http://DadsRecovery.blogspot.com and I need to revisit it- it was on suffering and it looks like our family is in for some more painful times.

This is it- this is what defines us: not how we act in the good times but how we react when faced with difficulties. Reality- it isn't optimistic nor is it pessimistic, it just is. I know we're all close enough to be there for each other and we'll get through this but moving forward can be so difficult when you keep feeling like all the challenges are threatening to hold you back. We will get through this, we will move forward but for today it will be with a heavy heart.

God, love us and help us love each other through this.

Go to...

http://sunnymcbunny.blogspot.com
My close friend and sister-in-law has a request, please see her blog.

Boundin’

From my favorite short film Boundin’ (it is about a resilient lil' lamb)

This is a great lil' song- the first part doesn't read well so I'm pickin' up from where it picks up...

He would dance for his neighbors across the way. I must say that they found his dancin’ enhanctin’, for they’d also join in the play.

Then one day… there came a-boundin up the slope a great American jackalope. This sage of the sage, this rare hare of hope, caused him to pause and check out the lamb.“Hey kid, why the mope?”

“I used to be something all covered with fluff, and I’d dance in the sunlight and show off my stuff, then they hauled me away in a matter quite roughand sheared me and dropped me back here in the buff. And if that’s not enough now my friends all laugh at me cause they think I look ridiculous, funny, and pink.”

“Pink? Pink? Well, what’s wrong with pink? Seems you’ve got a pink kink in your think. Does it matter what color? Well, that gets a nope- be it pink, purple, or heliotrope.

Now sometimes you’re up and sometimes you’re down, when you find that you’re down well just look around: you still got a body, good legs and fine feet, get your head in the right place and hey, you’re complete!

“Now as for the dancin’, you can do more, you can reach great heights, in fact you can soar. You just get a leg up and ya slap it on down, and you’ll find you’re up in what’s called a bound.

Bound, and rebound.

Bound and you’re up right next to the sky and I think you can do it if you give it a try.

First get a leg up, slap it on down…”

So every year, along about May, they’d load him up and they’d haul him away, and they’d shave him and dump him all naked and bare. He learned to live with it, he didn’t care. He’d just bound, bound, bound, and rebound.

Now in this world of ups and downs…its so nice to know there are jackalopes around.

I found this online and the grammer isn't setup right and I'm sure there are other mistakes- if you don't like it well...
Bound, Bound, Bound and Rebound- sometimes you're up and sometimes you're down.

Sour Grapes Indeed

My friend is having a

STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE SLUMBER PARTY

and now I can't go.

My email went something like this...

Darling Jessica, I feel like I haven’t talked to you in FOREVER and I regret to be having to discuss what I’m about to have to say…

(pause for dramatic effect)

I have to go out of town the week/weekend of your Strawberry Shortcake Slumber Party.

(imagine a disappointed look on my face)

I can’t believe it, I tried to get out of it but I couldn’t. I have been looking forward to this (the Slumber Party) for so long and now this. I even have all my Strawberry Shortcake stuff out AND I bought that Sour Grapes Doll and Snake Dreggs character special for it.

Believe it or not this is my FIRST business trip and I’m not even excited. I get to go to California and I’d rather forgo it attend your party but it isn’t up to me and I’m stuck- talk about Sour Grapes.

Please please forgive me,
Your friend (I hope still),
Kristy

She was understanding but I'm still wishing there was another way. How did this happen? Why? Is there something wrong with me that I'd rather go to a sleepover than go out-of-town?

LOL again

The Duck told me about a show that I forgot to watch. Maybe you’ve heard of it- My Name is Earl. I didn’t just forget to watch it once, I forgot twice but the Captain came to my rescue. He downloaded it and made me watch it. I thought it was awesome. The writing is so fresh and witty- not like your normal network shows at all. I wondered if they could keep it up and they have. The episode I watched last night was really funny. I mean he had to befriend and then be”mean” this really needy girlie girl. All this was because he had to make right the wrong he inflicted on her when he faked his death to avoid breaking up with her. Long story short, he did his best and it kept backfiring. Of course it didn’t end there- he came up with his own theory on how to deal with it (instead of following the maid’s advice- btw I love the maid but then again I love the whole cast).

Long story short, we were totally cracking up and I’m thinkin’ that paper mache looks like fun. The only “problem” I had with the episode is related to the casting of the girl he had to get away from. Why does the annoying ex-girlfriend always have to be so pretty? Pretty girls like that don’t get left- someone somewhere would put up with her crap because there’s always a guy that cares more about the outside than the inside. Does that sound cynical? I’m not trying to be, I just feel sorry for all the actresses out there that would look the part of the girl that a guy would go to the trouble of faking their death to escape from- you know what I mean?

I tried to add photos but got errors- sorry the blogs have been less visibly stimulating.

Let’s hear it for the boy….

My Man. Oh my man. He’s been doing all that he can. He’s stepped to the plate, he understands when I’m late, and now he impresses me daily.

I tell him I have to go out of town, I expect a frown, he says no problem and I am reminded why I love him.

He fixed the leak in the sink, he did a good job, he saved us lots of cash and replaced that fixture in a flash.

16 hours later the trampoline is up, the kids and I jump while he watches on, he can’t stick around to enjoy because this boy has to help out his Mom.

He’s a Good Man.

Feelings Smeelings

Okay, so I'm over the party thing. The parents had good intentions (I'm going to give them the benefit of the doubt that I wanted) and we do have a month before the party so I can see why they thought it should be open to change if change is possible and the majority did want it earlier...

Moving on, now I'm in real pain. Oach. Doing toe touches on trampolines isn't as easy as it use to be. Yeah that's right, you can add our trampoline to the list of FREE things we've been blessed with- along with this computer, this desk, our beds (all 3), our dressers (all 3), our entertainment center (which may have to be returned), etc etc. We are not proud, we know we don't have so much money that we turn down nice things just because they're used. We never have a problem taking someone's hand-me-downs. In fact all 4 of our TVs were free too- though they may also have to be returned. Did I mention our surround sound system was also free? I may have blogged about this before so I'll digress but even our bathroom towel holders were FREE. I LOVE FREE STUFF.

The kids are in heaven- and I'm happy too. What a fun way to spend time with them and what a good way to get exercise (next time I'm stretching first though).

Hurt Feelings

So I got my feelings REALLY hurt today.

A little background…
We are planning our End-of-Season Party for soccer and it has been a little cumbersome trying to meet everyone’s needs. I was thrilled with all the suggestions but the requirements started to become pretty narrow. I prioritized the “requests” and came up with what I thought was the perfect meet-in-the-middle/let’s-move-forward/right-at-the-time solution (with all things considered). Two Mom’s didn’t agree and fact checked me coming to the wrong conclusion. I was shocked that they didn't believe me but glad they at least addressed their concerns with me. Still once I clarified the details, I did not have their support of my decision like I had expected. Words like 'disappointed' and feelings of being 'deceived' were expressed- no apologizes we made and I got the feeling like their acceptance of my explanation was barely accepted at all.

Anyway, I wanted to say enough- everyone had a chance to offer their input but now a decision needs to be made because the discussion has gone on long enough. Maybe I’m wrong? What role do you think a soccer coach has in these decisions?

I’m not aware that my parents read this blog but comment with care.

PowerPoint

I love PowerPoint. It is a blast. Using clipart, formatting slides, timing out the animation- it just doesn’t get much better. We are doing a presentation for the FAA on Wednesday and I’m bursting with pride about the outcome of my very special PowerPoint Presentation specially made just for their approval. Tomorrow, we’ll printout the accompanying “manual” in color and all will have this professional masterpiece for their own viewing pleasure.

But I can’t celebrate it too early/or should I say I need to celebrate now because once we get started- they will rip it to shreds. It is true. I can’t fault them, that’s their job, but wow does it hurt when they stare are you with those cold eyes as they cut you down to size. I can’t help but wonder how I ended up working in this profession. So many career choices avoided because I DIDN’T want to deal with the rat race out there that slowly transfer good people into JERKS. I just never wanted to have to see people at their worst in my professional environment but here I am… I mean whoever says, I want to treat others like idiots when I grow up? I’m sure they didn’t either but here we are… and part of my job is to be prepared to look like a fool.

I always try to remind myself to be the type of person my “inner child” would like and respect. If our old self can like our young self and vice versa- we’re in pretty good shape right? That’s the way I see it anyway. So did life turn out the way you expected? Is being a “grown up” what you figured it would be? Does your day-to-day grind make you a jerk? Are you the type of “grown up” that you aspired to be- if not, is that a good thing?

Chili Cookoff

Now we, our department, have been informed that we are to be on a group together for our company's Chili Cookoff. I LOVE the Chili Cookoff and generally find the whole idea of working together for entertaining purposes to be a good thing. Having said that- I get too bossy but I try to keep it in check. I'm just competitive and so I want things done "right" though I know there's more than one way to do something "right". This I am sure of but in my defense- our teams always do well or at least are something we can feel good being apart of. So here I am, almost totally out of ideas.

We've got Soccer Moms (even though we have boys on the team) and that's about it. We did think about doing a play on Charlie's Angels and be Fred's (our boss' name) Angels but after thinkin' it over- I just didn't feel it. So now my good friend and coworker mentioned it might be smart to have a name that has something to do with chili. Now I'm think Chilly Chili-might be good- like cold outside chili. But beyond that I'm not sooo sure. We'll need a backdrop, props, and costumes- lots to consider. What do you think? We get some money from the company to work with but it doesn't go too far. I've got this Tim Burton thing in my mind- taking our paper rolls and twisting them up, painting them black and making big scary trees out of them and such. Then putting "snow" on everything. I'm not sure what else....

Any other ideas, feedback on this one, thoughts?

Crispy Critter

Okay, big kid is going to be the Human Torch for Halloween. I let him pick out a store bought costume (ewwhhh.... gasp) because even though I'd love to make him something unique and interesting- he'd rather be just like the other kids in their store bought costumes. So here I am, helping my kid manage his world of aspiring for mediocrity. It isn't all bad- he's too young to really get the point of being different and at least he's not the kind-of kid wanting to be different just to get negative attention. So anyway, the days of me picking out his costume are over.

Now, my 3 year old is another story. I have complete control (or at least another year before he wants to make up his own mind on what he wants to be for Halloween). That and I have plenty of backup costumes if the one I decide on doesn't work out. So here's my idea- the older is the Human Torch so why not make the younger a Crispy Kritter? He'll be all burnt up. I'm trying to think of something I can do to make it interesting. Like maybe get a black hoodie and glue on Black curly ribbon with red and orange on the ends- and have him completely covered? Or maybe get some black "fur" material and make him a vest type overlay thing and use black and gray dust for his hair and face (not sure where to get that but...).

Any suggestions? I generally ask and then go my own direction so don't get your feelings hurt if I don't take what you say to heart but know I'll consider it and it will at least contribute to the overall thought process.

Your thoughts? My disclaimer isn't very welcoming but don't let that discourage you.

Emma

And so I beg of your comments and you give nothing in turn. How can it be that I am asked to post my thoughts and yet they go out there with not a response? It is dreadful and shameful. Have you no regard for the feelings of this poor poor blogger?

Okay, so if I am being dramatic it is a direct result of the movie of which I just now completed the view of. A dear dear movie that I did not see sooner for fear it would be a dreadful bore but alas I must admit I was mistaken.

This movie was exquisite. Fascinating and as wonderful to see as it was to hear. I long for times when speech is so well thought out, when subtlies are spoken with such grace. I speak of, if you cannot tell, the wonderful wonderful Emma.

Emma, you are such a pleasant pleasant film- one that assures me of romance and its role in society. I watched this movie of marriage ambitions and young love and am reminded of the free spiritedness that dwells in us all. How we long for what we know not of and often take for granted the blessings we are currently partaking in.

How pleasing for this stroll down a path of such a diverse and unique a portrait of another world, a good world indeed.

So what unexpected movies have you seen that made you appreciate something of which you may have not anticipated?

Great quotes from my favorite site...
Emma: I may have lost my heart, but not my self-control.

Mr. Knightley: I rode through the rain! I'd - I'd ride through worse than that if I could just hear your voice telling me that I might, at least, have some chance to win you.

Mr. Knightley: Emma, you didn't ask me to contribute a riddle.
Emma: Your entire personality is a riddle, Mr. Knightley. I thought you overqualified.

Miss Bates: It left us speechless, quite speechless I tell you, and we have not stopped talking of it since.

Mr. Knightley: You must be happy that she settled so well.
Emma: Indeed! One matter of joy in this is that I made the match myself. People said Mr. Weston would never marry again, and what a triumph!
Mr. Knightley: Triumph? You made a lucky guess!
Emma: Have you never known the triumph of a lucky guess? Had I not promoted Mr. Weston's visits and given encouragement where encouragement was needed, we might not have had a wedding today.
Mr. Woodhouse: Then please, my dear, encourage no one else. Marriage is so disrupting to one's social circle.

Mr. Knightley: Marry me. Marry me, my wonderful, darling friend.
Emma: Mr. Knightley, if I have not spoken, it is because I am afraid I will awaken myself from this dream.

Expectations (revised)

So I have been slackin' - I didn't realize so many people were tuning in. I LOVE IT. So now I'll promise to do better but really you need to comment more so I feel like I'm being heard :)

Having said that, there just seems to be less and less time to blog these days- maybe it is the fact that my soccer blog has really taken off too. I'm super excited about it but I didn't expect it.

So maybe that is what I will talk about today- expectations. I have them, I enjoy them, I try hard to meet them. I often do but sometimes... well sometimes expectations are set that are out of your hands. For example- I am a people person. Yeah it sounds cliché but it is true. I thrive off of my relationships but I sometimes expect too much out of them. I gather energy and strength when I'm surrounded by people I relate to and I find myself suffering or declining in enthusiasm when I'm around those who don't "give back". When I deal with the people who "don't meet my expectations" I get disappointed and for some reason I think everyone will meet my expectations because my expectations are basically pretty low and because I generally think highly of people (unless given a reason not to).

I don't mean that people I befriend have to be just like me but I guess I want them to try and see the good in life; if that's too hard they have to be at least honest and real (and friendly), that's really good enough. But when people don't try at all... well I don't have alot of time for them. I love the idea that I don't have to have time for everyone. A friend of mine mentioned being discriminate about the people she is friends with. That is something I have never done. I try to befriend all those I come into contact with. It has worked in a way, you meet all kinds of people and they teach you different things. But if those people aren't kind, aren't caring, aren't givers- you've got to rethink how much effort you put into them.

Having said that- last night was so fun. I went to a Baby Shower at McBunny's for someone I didn't really know. She was nice and after getting to know her better- I know she's REALLY nice. It was a great time and I met other nice people too. So wonderful that McFunny opened up her home to make this person feel cared for, it showed me what a great person and friend she is- she's the exact type of friend I want to invest myself and my efforts in. Seeing Mom help out proved again how everything is better when she's involved, she's another example of a person that enriches my life and reminds me that expectations are good- because obviously with people like this in the world, those expectations can be met. I love you guys.

Batteries and Such

Batteries are going to be the death of me- we never have the right ones or the toy that needs them is a major pain to replace them in. I usually (and secretly) don’t want the toy to work anyway so when it goes dead- it is like I get a lil’ much needed brake. But the kids eventually can’t hold out any longer and the requests for batteries start coming fast and furious. I know the request is reasonable- I mean why not replace them? But that means more than just having to get off my butt and going to get them- it usually means I need to prepare myself for a lot of noise and probably fighting because a toy with new batteries becomes new in and of itself and a “new” toy is something the boys just can’t help but fight over.

I’m overstating- the boys don’t fight that often and I’m usually not “on my butt” (except when blogging which I’ve had to cut down on). Anyway, I really do enjoy most of the toys but the really noisy ones and/or the remote control ones seem to cause more problems than they’re worth sometimes (though yes, the boys do love them so…).

One of these days I’ll invest in a big ole set of rechargeables- like one of those chargers with batteries that come every size and lots of them that are ready for use anytime- but I think they cost a lot of $$$. We’ll see.

Well, I’m off to track down some double As, wish me luck. If we’re out, it will be another trip to Target or Wal-Mart tomorrow and $50 later I’ll be wondering what happened. And then I’ll be complaining about $$$ in my next blog (ha ha). Well maybe I'm not kidding. Then again, complaining about $$$ is like complaining about air- it is something we need/can't live without and even if you're not getting what you want out of it- any amount is still better than nothing.

Fun

Okay, as you get older- your version of fun changes. What use to be your version of fun? What is it now?

Today, I had lots of fun and the 16 year old in me is like- WOW, times they are a changing. But seriously, watching my boys playing soccer is so entertaining to me. I'm the proud Mom just soaking it up on the sidelines. This is it- this is why I had kids. These moments are so important to me. Sharing it with my family is the icing on the cake.

My team, yeah Team Titans, they were especially good. Last week we had a shaky start and I had a busy day weekend and it sort-of felt like things were not lookin' so good when all was said and done. But boy oh boy was I wrong. Today, I was reminded of just how great it is being a coach- my kids are so cute and they try so hard. The whole thing is just really rewarding and everyone helps out and it makes you think there is hope in the world that goodness is all around us.

Having said that- staying up the night before till after 1am watching 9 kids might have been a lil' counterproductive to a good morning today. Man was I tired. These allergies are not helping either. Oh well, the Captain surprised me w/an afternoon to myself and I've been enjoying doing nothing- well I watched a movie, ate and ate, then had a great talk w/my Mom and finally got around to downloading my pictures to my various blogs. All is well. Now we'll be going to a Rangers game in a few hours- that will be super fun too.

Life is good.

GirlsNightOut9/24

This was a great night. I loved hangin' out with these Chicks.

They know how to have fun without behaving badly.

Sometimes growing up is a good thing.